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Rarely There

A collection of discourses - myriad, profound, uplifting...
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Thursday, September 28, 2006

slightly blue-gray day

Today, I feel rather dull, and things seem pointless. It is as if nobody really understands me and I don't understand people much. I think I do. At least I know I sincerely try to understand. I think I try to be nice most of the time. I know I am not the nicest always: stress does make me act in an uncharacteristically irritable way. But, those moments thankfully are usually fleeting, and once I vent, I am back to my usual fairly-nice self.

Today was not fun at work. It was not fun at home. It is one of those days when I feel I have let myself down and have let my near and dear down. Not sure how or why.

My better half tells me that I need to stop worrying about what others think and how others interpret my words and my intentions. He says as long as I know my intentions were good and as long as I know I didn't do anything wrong, I shouldn't stress about how others see it. Easy for him to say.

I do admit, I am quite the worrier, quite the stresser - I sometimes end up over-thinking and over-complicating my life, needlessly. It somehow makes me feel more 'responsible'. I could be wrong about that.

I hope I can sleep this feeling off tonight, and wash it away for good tomorrow morning...

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